Story
Apologies for the monologue, but if there's one thing we love, it's talking...
ACCORDING TO HER:
We began as partners. Some of you might remember us then. Comrades and confidantes. Or as I once called it: "barely friends." We served as team captains for the motley crue that is Baylor MUN...solving all of the UN's most pressing dilemmas, lovingly testing the limits of our dear Dr. Flavin, bickering over phrasing (I have a penchant for writing like a drunk medieval lord), sharing the strangest coincidences - both of our dads are USC alumni and we were almost neighbors in Anthem - as well as a love for the most horrible humor and generally entertaining (subjecting) our teammates (captive audience) with our antics.
I left Baylor having enjoyed my time with Tyler so much I forgot all about it and lost touch while I went MIA exploring the most obscure nooks and crannies of the world and Tyler ended up in New York.
We started chatting again after he sent me a message for my birthday a few years ago and I persuaded him to join a trip I was planning with some friends, since he never really got a chance to travel. I grew up overseas in Indonesia and was desperate to go home. One by one, everyone flaked until it was just the two of us and we spent two weeks there, falling in love without realizing it. Well, one realized and the other denied.
We became inseparable over the next few months, chatting nonstop and getting creative with visits because of the long distance - the everywhere option on Skyscanner is our favorite! But having realized that there were very real consequences to getting so close, I furiously began backpedaling and pushing away as we contrarians do. Which generally, seems to work but I sincerely underestimated Tyler’s stubbornness and so we became locked in a battle of shared but opposing wills. The amount of times I subjected him to my loopholes without being fazed is an absolute testament to his needing to be right (we’ll call it patience).
He grounds my flighty ways and has given me an appreciation for roots and for home. I drag him so far out of his comfort zone, I sincerely doubt he remembers what it looks like and force him to be my partner in crime on all sorts of crazy adventures. Together, we’ve braved grocery shopping on Valentines Day, circular cake making, Indonesia, Morocco, Spain, Japan, Iceland, most randomly, Rarotonga and our favorite place - the Stonehill Cottages in Mena, AK (naturally).
He spent months designing my ring and surprised me with a trip back to Indonesia where he proposed at the Borobudur - we spent our first day together there last time, talking for hours. He even managed to get both of our parents there to celebrate with us. It was the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for me.
What I love most about him is that he is my partner, in every sense of the word. He’s my companion, partner in crime and confidante. He’s protective but encouraging. He’s a friend to all and is loved by everyone. It’s the effort and gestures he makes through our big moments but especially our most quiet ones - insisting on opening my door, choosing to stay up to help, following my roundabout stories, remaining comically unfazed through my occasional bouts of having the emotional range of a teaspoon, protecting others from hurt - that I notice. And remember. I’m so grateful for each and every single one. (I’ll try to remember for our next Shakespeare worthy feud over deckled edged invitations).
We’re imperfectly perfect and it’s been such a joy to be his partner. There are a million ways and other times we might not have ended up together so we try to remember it’s our choice to choose each other, every day. I’m so excited for our forever, together.
ACCORDING TO HIM:
Our story isn’t one of missed opportunities, but rather of timing. Sharita and I met back in college through our model united nations club at Baylor. I'll never forget that first day. It's hard to explain but that group of people felt like family from the moment I joined. It was everything I wanted and hoped to find in a fraternity. I was shocked by how diverse and fascinating everyone was, and most of all, Sharita. I had never met people like them - people who came from all around the world, who spoke different languages, had unique experiences, and challenged each other to see critical issues through a different lens. Even among this worldly bunch, Sharita shined. She was cute and surprisingly fierce - stealing the attention of the room any time she spoke. She was everything I wasn’t, but still strive to be: worldly, thoughtful, and most of all kind. We spent the next few years getting to know each other; developing a strong and very real admiration for each other, while remaining respectful and never bordering on romance.
But graduation came and went and we both got caught up in our own lives. There was a running joke amongst our friends that Sharita wasn’t real. We figured she was either a spy, an angel, or a figment of our imaginations. How else could you explain someone so magnetic and compelling, who then so suddenly vanished from your life? And then, in what felt like the worst possible moment - the timing finally clicked. I had just been dragged through hell and back when completely unexpectedly, there she was again. It was a message that I can't quite remember but touched me all the same. Here was someone who wasn't part of my life anymore who cared enough to reach out and let me know that she was there and was thinking of me.
On her birthday, I decided to get back in touch and we haven't stopped talking since. She invited me to come visit her in Dallas (she insists she wasn't serious, but I’ll always be convinced that she secretly wanted me there and just won't admit it to herself). Much to her surprise, I not only accepted the offer, I insisted that she and I get a few of our old friends together to travel. I'd spent years hearing about all her travels and wanted in! So we got to planning and as our plans usually go, instead of Iceland we ended up in Indonesia. Rather unsurprisingly, everyone else dropped out for one reason or another, but I wouldn't be deterred (despite my morbid countdown of all the ways that might interfere with me coming home). Nothing could stop me.
As we got wrapped up in working out the details of our trip, there was an undeniable (depending on who you ask, that is) connection that grew between the two of us. It got to the point where my friends teased me about how I was going to fall in love with her, but I denied and said I absolutely refused to get involved. You can probably see where this is going…
After months of planning (her), waiting (us), and panicking (me), I landed and saw her waiting. I don't remember much else. Sure, there’s the obvious excitement of seeing a familiar face after 36 hours of flights, delays, and questionable access to showers, but there was more. From that moment, we've been inseparable. We spent the rest of our time in Indonesia caught up in that rare kind of conversation - the kind that's natural and effortless - and teasing, with some admittedly poor flirting on my part (I was out of practice, cut me some slack). I went back to my room and jokingly conceded defeat to my friends. Whether I fully understood it yet or not, I loved her and decided to do anything to be by her side.
Ha! If you know Sharita, you'll know it could never be that easy. But even I didn't expect the absolute stubbornness I'd have to fight through. No matter what I tried, Sharita found a way to deny me. Even though we'd talk all day, she INSISTED she'd never date me and her reasons got increasingly more creative (thanks for all the loopholes, honey). I remember one night in particular. I had come to Texas to visit her and instead found myself on a "spontaneous" group trip to Arkansas. We stayed up for hours and I decided it was time to play my cards. She liked me, whether she cared to admit it or not. But she just kept saying “no” over and over again (to our friends eavesdropping - you're welcome for the unintentional comedy show). I laughed and told her to wait. She'd see.
Luckily for me, it didn’t take much longer. She came to visit and while she still managed to insist we were just friends, she soon (finally) gave in and we became us. Our lives have been filled ever since with the comic highs and lows of any relationship, with a few uniquely our own - Skype movie dates, kitchen wars and using any excuse to travel (and be together). I’ve never loved anyone like I've loved Sharita. It's deep and real and strong enough to earn her love, every day. She is everything to me, and I can’t imagine spending a moment without her by my side.
So thanks for reading my long winded, but totally true and unbiased account of how I came to love the most wonderful person I’ve ever met. For those of you who know her, I’m sure you see what I see, and for those of you who haven’t, you’ll soon see why I’m the luckiest guy on earth. (I'm off now to do some really manly things to try to redeem myself from all this).