Last Updated on June 26, 2025 by Joy Editors
Not sure about the right time to send your save the dates? Don’t worry – lots of couples struggle with this question!
The timing of these pre-invitation announcements can make a huge difference in guest attendance at your special day. Wedding experts say you should send them six to eight months before your ceremony. Planning a destination wedding or holiday weekend celebration? You’ll need to send them even earlier – about eight months ahead.
Many wedding professionals suggest mailing save the dates 8 to 12 months before your big day. Your guests will appreciate the extra time to request work leave, plan their travel, and save money for your celebration.
Here’s the thing – couples often wait too long. Sending these notices less than four months before the wedding doesn’t work well. The traditional 6-12 month window keeps getting longer, and some couples now send their save the dates two years ahead!
Let’s look at the five most common timing mistakes couples make with save the dates and show you how to avoid them. This way, your guests will get all the details they need at just the right time.
Mistake 1: Sending Save the Dates Too Late
Many couples put off sending their save-the-dates until they’re running out of time. This mistake can substantially affect how many guests attend your wedding and add extra stress that you and your guests don’t need.
Why timing matters for guests
Save-the-dates do more than just announce your wedding date. Your loved ones might make other plans like vacations or commit to another wedding without enough notice. Your guests need time to:
- Book travel arrangements and accommodations
- Request time off from work
- Arrange childcare or pet sitting
- Save money for travel expenses
- Get passports or visas ready (for international destinations)
Late notices often lead to disappointment. A wedding planning expert points out, “Without giving a heads up, you run the risk of guests making other plans… You want as many of your loved ones to celebrate with you as possible”.
What counts as too late? Sending save-the-dates less than four months before your wedding doesn’t give guests enough notice. You should skip straight to formal invitations at that point.
Ideal timeline for local vs. destination weddings
The perfect time to send save-the-dates for local weddings falls between six to eight months before your celebration. This gives your guests enough time to clear their schedules and make plans.
All the same, you might want to send them closer to the eight-month mark if:
- You’re planning a wedding on a holiday weekend
- Your date falls during peak wedding season (June through September)
- Your venue sits in a popular spot with limited places to stay
Destination weddings need more advance notice. You should mail save-the-dates 9 to 12 months ahead. Your guests need this extra time because they have more planning to do.
Wedding experts say it best: “Destination weddings require more notice because they require more planning… Guests may need to buy plane tickets, including potentially more expensive international fares, get a passport, book hotel rooms, rent a car…”.
On top of that, weddings during major holidays might need save-the-dates up to 12 months ahead. Here’s how the timing breaks down by season:
- Spring Wedding: Mail the prior summer
- Summer Wedding: Mail the prior fall to early winter
- Fall Wedding: Mail in late winter
- Winter Wedding: Mail the prior spring to early summer
These guidelines offer some wiggle room, but waiting too long creates problems you don’t need. The main goal is to get on your guests’ calendars before they make other plans, especially those traveling from far away.
Mistake 2: Sending Them Too Early
Sending save the dates too late causes problems, but rushing to send them too early creates its own challenges. Many excited couples rush to share their wedding date and learn that very early announcements aren’t as helpful as they originally thought.
When is it too soon?
Wedding experts agree that sending save the dates more than 12 months before your wedding day is too early. This applies even to destination weddings that need extensive travel arrangements, where the maximum suggested timeline is about one year ahead.
Some couples stretch this timeline by sending announcements up to two years before their celebration. This extended timeframe rarely works well for most weddings.
The ideal window for save the dates remains:
- Standard weddings: 6-8 months before your wedding date
- Destination weddings: 9-12 months prior
- Micro weddings (under 50 guests): 6-9 months ahead, though formal save the dates may be optional for very small gatherings
You might want to secure your date on everyone’s calendar right away, but sending them too early can backfire. A wedding expert explains, “With all the planning guests have to do, it’s best to send out your save the dates as early as possible, right? That seems like solid logic, but sending out your save the dates too early can backfire in a big way”.
Risks of early sending
Sending save the dates too far ahead comes with several major drawbacks:
People tend to forget things naturally. Save the dates sent a year or more ahead often end up forgotten in a drawer. A wedding planner notes, “Since it’s too early to plan, prospective guests are probably going to stick the save the date in a desk drawer or tuck it into their purse where it will promptly be forgotten”.
Your plans might need adjustments. Early in wedding planning, you may not have locked down key details like venue, date, or guest list. One wedding expert warns, “You’ve got a year to go until your proposed wedding date and you can’t wait to let people know. But then you really get stuck into wedding planning and realize your dream day isn’t in your hometown like you thought, but at a ski chalet in New England”.
Unexpected circumstances could force changes such as:
- Venue issues like double bookings or damage from natural disasters
- Military deployments affecting the couple or key family members
- Finding ideal ceremony times only after talking with photographers and other vendors
Changes after sending save the dates mean you’ll need to send update cards. This creates confusion among guests who may have already made non-refundable travel arrangements.
Early save the dates arrive before most people can request time off work or make solid plans. College students won’t know their class schedules multiple semesters ahead, which makes attendance planning harder.
Save the dates should arrive when guests are ready to start planning. This keeps your wedding fresh in their minds instead of becoming a distant future event they might forget.
Mistake 3: Not Being Clear About Who’s Invited
Guest list confusion ranks among the most awkward wedding planning mishaps. You need to clearly communicate who is invited to your celebration after figuring out when to send save the dates. Any ambiguity can lead to uncomfortable conversations and unexpected plus-ones at your venue.
How to address guests properly
The right addressing sets clear expectations. Your save the dates’ names indicate who’s included in your invitation. Married couples can be addressed as “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” or “Jane and John Smith” based on your formality preference. Unmarried couples living together should have both names on a single save the date: “Jane Doe and John Smith.”
Single guests should receive individual addresses without “and guest” unless you’re including a plus-one. This approach prevents any confusion about bringing dates.
The envelope plays a crucial role. Anyone whose name appears on the envelope (or digital equivalent) is invited. People not listed should understand they aren’t part of the invitation.
Names matter, but these phrases add extra clarity:
- “We’ve reserved 2 seats in your honor”
- “Adult-only celebration”
- “[Number] guests” written in the RSVP section
Handling plus-ones and families
Plus-ones create the most confusion. You need consistent rules to avoid hurt feelings. Common approaches include:
- Plus-ones only for guests in established relationships
- Wedding party members get plus-ones regardless of relationship status
- Out-of-town guests receive plus-ones
- Relationships must be 6+ months old
Family invitations need clear communication about children. List children’s names individually on the save the date or address it to “The Smith Family” if they’re invited. Adults-only weddings should address only the parents: “Jane and John Smith.”
Inviting only certain children (like immediate family) requires personal conversations along with your save the dates.
Your wedding website can help clarify everything. Add an FAQ section about plus-ones and children. The RSVP system should limit responses to explicitly invited guests.
Clear guest list communication with save the dates prevents problems later. Stopping assumptions about guest lists is just as vital as timing them right.
Mistake 4: Skipping Save the Dates Altogether
Many couples ask themselves if they really need save the dates or if they can cut this expense from their wedding budget. Wedding costs keep rising, and couples want to save money wherever they can. But not sending this pre-invitation notice could be a mistake you’ll regret.
Why they’re important
Save the dates do much more than just tell people when you’re getting married. We needed them to help guests block off their calendars way ahead of time, which means your favorite people can actually make it to your celebration. Your guests might make other plans without enough notice, and this happens a lot during popular wedding dates.
These cards become even more valuable when:
- Your guests need to make travel plans
- You’ve picked a destination wedding that needs advance booking
- Your big day falls near holidays or in peak wedding season
- People need time off work or have to find childcare
Save the dates tell your guests they’ve made it to your guest list. This heads off any awkward conversations later and gives everyone time to budget, which matters a lot if they need to travel.
On top of that, it lets you double-check addresses before you print those fancy invitations, which saves money on wasted stationery. These cards give your guests their first peek at what kind of celebration you’re planning.
When it’s okay to skip them
Of course, sometimes you don’t need save the dates:
A short engagement of less than four months means you can jump straight to invitations. Just remember to send them earlier than the usual 8-week timeline.
Most of your guests live nearby and don’t need much planning time to attend your wedding. Small, intimate gatherings with close family who already know your plans might only need a quick heads-up.
Money’s another good reason. If your budget’s tight, you might want to spend that cash on better invitations or other parts of your wedding.
You might also want to hold off if you haven’t figured out your guest list yet, or you’re still deciding about plus-ones and kids. This works great if you’re secretly hoping some people can’t make it so you can invite others from your B-list.
About 80% of couples send save the dates, but your choice depends on your timeline, circumstances, and what works best for your guests.
Mistake 5: Missing Key Information
The content of your save the dates matters just as much as timing and guest list clarity. Many couples pay attention to sending dates but miss out on including the right information. This leads to confused guests who ask unnecessary questions.
What to include on a save the date
Every save the date card needs these basic elements:
- Your names – This detail makes a difference. Full names work best for formal weddings. First names create a more relaxed feel for intimate gatherings.
- Wedding date – This detail gives these cards their purpose. Add the complete date without ceremony times.
- Location – The city and state/country of your celebration is enough. You don’t need venue details at this stage.
- “Invitation to follow” phrase – This simple line lets guests know that formal invitations with complete details will arrive later.
Keep some details for later. Hotel bookings, ceremony times, dress codes, and RSVP requests belong in the formal invitation. Too much information too early can overwhelm your guests.
Optional but helpful additions like wedding websites
A wedding website address stands out as the most useful optional element. Your guests can find extra information on this digital platform without crowding the save the date card. Wedding experts say that “Incorporating a wedding website link into your save-the-date card is an effective strategy for sharing detailed information with your guests”.
These thoughtful additions can enhance your save the dates:
- QR code linking to your wedding website – A modern way to save space
- Engagement photos – Personal touches help distant relatives recognize you
- Custom illustrations – An artistic venue or destination sketch adds charm
Save the dates establish the visual style for all your wedding correspondence. Match the design with your wedding’s colors and style to reflect your vision. The visual elements should show your wedding’s character while keeping the content simple.
Conclusion
Conclusion
The right timing for save-the-dates is one of the most overlooked parts of wedding planning. This piece has covered five major issues couples face when they send these pre-invitations.
Most couples should send their save-the-dates 6-8 months before the wedding day. Destination weddings need more time – about 9-12 months ahead. Early notices might get forgotten or clash with changing plans. Late ones could mean your guests have other commitments.
Your guest list needs to be crystal clear from the start. The way you address your save-the-dates should tell guests if they can bring plus-ones or children. This simple detail can prevent a lot of confusion about who’s invited.
Many couples ask if they really need save-the-dates. The answer depends on your wedding’s timeline and your guests’ situations. You might skip this step for short engagements or local guests. But these notices are a great way to get people to plan ahead, especially for weddings that need travel plans or fall on popular dates.
The content of your save-the-dates is just as crucial as their timing. You’ll need your names, wedding date, location, and a note about the formal invitation coming later. Adding your wedding website’s link makes things easier without cramming too much information.
Save-the-dates are your first announcement about your big day. They help set the right expectations and make sure your loved ones can be there to celebrate with you. Good timing and clear details lead to better attendance and less stress as your wedding approaches.
The time you spend planning now will make a huge difference later. Your special day will be even better with all your favorite people there. After all, weddings bring people together – and your save-the-dates help make that happen.
