Let’s Look at the Deceptively Simple Concept of “Comfort” on a Wedding Day

    If you search for ways to feel more comfortable on your wedding day you will find an abundance of tips and tricks. There are slimming undergarments that keep everything tight while keeping you comfortable. There are ways to break in your heels so they don't give you blisters. There are tips on how to position your shoulders so you appear more comfortable in photographs (even if you aren't actually comfortable). There are small handheld fans that keep your guests comfortable.

    Based off all these articles it is very clear: comfort is a priority.

    But when you peel back the heart and soul of these pieces it’s pretty clear: physical comfort is often prioritized.

    And I wholeheartedly agree with this. As a bride or groom, the last thing you want your mind to focus on during a wedding day is the uncomfortable pinching you feel from a strange button. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

    But what I also think is important is to unearth the complex layers of the word “comfort” and how this seemingly simple word is capable of creating a vast array of stress for wedding planners. We can stress ourselves out feeling the pressure of making sure everyone is comfortable. And comfort doesn’t start and stop with physical details.

    When looking at the Merriam-Webster definition of comfort we see 1. a: affording or enjoying contentment and security b: affording or enjoying physical comfort. 2. a: free from vexation or doubt b: free from stress or tension.

    Let’s recap really quick, because some of those words are a serious part of the wedding-planning process. Let’s unpack those definitions a bit: Contentment, security, physical comfort, freedom from doubt, freedom from stress, freedom from tension.

    Doubt, stress, tension…do these things sound familiar, dearest wedding planner??

    Photo by Emma Frances Logan

    Comfort is such an all-powerful, holistic concept. Emotional comfort. Mental comfort. Physical comfort. This is why “comfort food” is such a fucking powerful thing. The Atlantic looked at “Why Comfort Food Comforts” which analyzed “the intersection of taste, nostalgia and loneliness.”

    We can think about the comfort of our hearts, the comfort of our families, and the comfort of our souls. We can try and capture the same positive potential found within comfort food during an otherwise tense or stressful day.

    While people often associate the concept of comfort food with caloric value or high sugar/fat content food, it is actually a much more complex and psychological experience. As a study showed, these foods also “provide something social to us.”

    The stronger people have an emotional relationship with a food — such as positive childhood memories — the more comfort it brings.

    We can look past the physical construct of simply eating fatty foods and understand we often reach for those things that help feed our soul, our heart, and our mind as well.

    We all know that “self-care” is sort of the hot buzz phrase right now, but for good reason! Do what you gotta do to take care of yourself during this time that might cause some doubt, stress, or tension. Find those people in your life who are like comfort food…who give you what your heart needs, when you need it.

    Listen, I know this doesn’t solve the “how to be comfortable on a wedding day” conundrum. But it helps you think of the concept of comfort in a kaleidoscope lens. We can think beyond blistered heels and beyond strapless bras that dig into our ribcages. We can think about the comfort of our hearts, the comfort of our families, and the comfort of our souls. We can try and capture the same positive potential found within comfort food during an otherwise tense or stressful day.

    What about you?

    Do you prioritize comfort when it comes to wedding planning? What does “comfort” mean to you?

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